Navigating Self-Discovery: How Coaching Reshaped Sabrina's Life - An Interview

When Sabrina Rivera took Foundations of Coaching, she had no idea her learning would change the course of her life. In this conversation with Sabrina, she shares how what started out as coaching training to help in her job, turned her focus inward, where she found answers, and a more fulfilling path forward.

Q: What inspired you to take the Foundations of Coaching course?

A: When Nic contacted me about the Foundations of Coaching course, I was working directly with really vulnerable groups, and as I engaged with them, there were many situations where participants were seeking my opinion and looking for solutions. Of course, our program didn’t offer coaching, but I had taken a one of Nic’s coaching workshops while working with a previous employer, and I never forgot the impact. The leaders did such a good job of creating an environment where our team felt safe to be vulnerable with one another and to make commitments to care for ourselves and each other in our workplace. I knew I wanted to learn more elements of coaching, to be able to integrate some of these skills. I wanted to be able to walk alongside these folks I was working with and empowering them to find solutions for themselves.

Q: Were you able to apply your coaching skills to your work environment?

A: Actually, it didn’t turn out exactly as planned. At the time of taking the training, I was going through a very difficult time at work. There were various aspects of my job that left me feeling unfulfilled and a bit lost; like I was spinning my wheels. This was taking a giant toll on my mental and physical health. It was getting to a place where it was not sustainable for me, and that’s actually where coaching came in. I found myself saying to Nic and Janelle, these questions are so powerful and so helpful for organizing my own thoughts. I found I was able to use the questions, process and frameworks to coach myself through this really trying time in my life.

Q: Can you share more about applying the principles to your own difficulties?

A: I used questions from the course handbook to work through my feelings. I used the Four Cs (their model for phases of coaching) to get to a place where I knew what I had to do to change this challenging situation. This was so important and meaningful because my instinct has always been to run in these situations - to avoid conflict. The coaching emphasizes curiosity about yourself and people around you, and I really wanted to challenge myself to not run this time. To get to a place of new understanding, I asked myself: What does it look like to stay still? What does it take to find a way around this situation? How do I get to a place that feels like contentment? These questions helped me untangle some of those feelings I was having and examine some of the conflicts. It helped me to create proposals for how I wanted my work to be different, and what I wanted it to look like going forward. I was even empowered to propose those solutions to my manager.

Q: How did that play out for you?

A: Ultimately, I came to the decision to resign from that position, but because of the productive dialogue I had with my manager, she asked if I would stay on in a more part-time role, to continue with some of the facilitating. I said yes, and now when I reflect back on it, this is exactly where I wanted things to be in my job and in my life. I wanted more flexibility in work. I wanted certain things like more balance, that I really didn’t have that before. So even though it didn’t look exactly as I had proposed, I landed pretty darn close to where I wanted to be. I get to do my favourite part of that position, which is interacting, learning and being in dialogue with migrant folks, but now I’m not so mentally overwhelmed by my work. I have space to connect with my partner, engage with my family, take part in recreational activities and hobbies … it’s wonderful! The shift opened up new questions like: What does this next year look like? What do I want it to look like? And the answer came … to go back to graduate school. I applied to take industrial and organizational psychology at Adler University and got accepted! I start this fall!

Q: How has Self Coaching impacted you in other areas of your life?

A: I continue to use these questions in various moment of tension with loved ones. I find that by asking myself these questions and working through my answers, the self reflection helps me find the ability to articulate to others what I’m feeling. It seems to help me find a more rational, constructive, and productive way through tensions. I’m very grateful for that because I’m very conflict averse and when there is tension building, I get very overwhelmed and I can’t organize my thoughts. Frameworks like the 4Cs, levels of listening, and being curious, have really helped me to feel less overwhelmed and to organize my thoughts and feel safe sharing them with other people.

Q: Can you share the questions you find helpful?

A: Some of the questions I like to ask myself are:

What am I feeling?

Why is this important to me?

Is there tension in some parts of my body?

What do I need to feel safe in this conflictual situation?

What’s opening up for me here in this conflict?

What is a way through?

Q: Have those closest to you noticed a change in you or your approach to conflict?

A: In general, my partner and I are high communicators. We talk about our feelings all the time, and we have a lot of emotional check-in sessions. But the feedback I’m getting from my partner recently is that I’m so much happier – more content – more connected to things that give me joy. I know that is a result of all of the shifts that have occurred since I took the Foundations for Coaching course. On a personal level, I notice a big difference in myself; in my ability to regulate my thoughts, express my feelings, and really tap into my body and my emotions in a whole new healthy way.